ASPECTS OF SELF DEFENCE

Awareness And Avoidence

Awareness is a state of mind of knowing what is happening or may be about to happen. In the context of self defence, it is a state of mind where observations are done without effort. This may involve noticing a threatening exchange in a pub and moving away before trouble starts or taking a slightly longer way home on a dark night to avoid a poorly lit area. These are sensible precautions that make you aware of possible danger and that you take positive action to avoid it. Safety and awareness can be learned so that they are almost second nature and doesn’t intrude on your everyday life. Start thinking now about your personal safety and it will become second nature. Remember self defence is all about avoiding trouble and only resorting to a physical response as a last resort.

Essential Advice On Safety

• Do not take short cuts home and do avoid deserted roads and subways at night
• Always walk in the middle of the pavement to help prevent an unexpected attack from someone lurking in a doorway
• Do not hitch hike or accept lifts from strangers
• Do not turn your back on someone who is or has acted aggressively towards you
• Do not ignore anything that you consider could mean danger. Assume it does and act accordingly

Types Of Behavior And Self Defence

I am sure that everyone here has seen wildlife programs where animals do pick their victims on the basis of how easy the potential prey look to attack successfully. In many cases this happens in everyday life too. If a attacker picks on a victim without speaking to them why has it happened? How has the victim conveyed the message that they are a potential target. Research carried out by professor Ray Birdswhistell concluded that more communication takes place by the use of gestures, postures and position than by verbal means.

His research revealed that communication is made up of the following:

Verbal - 7% message

Body language - 55% message

Tone - 38% message

Obviously if the attacker picks their target first without speaking to them then body language of the potential victim has played an even more important role. In basic terms we all exhibit three types of behaviour, although we may emphasis one of them more than others. The three types of behaviour are:

• SUBMISSIVE
• AGGRESSIVE
• ASSERTIVE

Submissive Behaviour And Self Defence

If you behave in a submissive way you are taking on the role of a potential victim. A submissive person may feel uncomfortable but will be unable to express clear signals. A submissive women who does not want to be touched will tell the man ‘not to do that’, but she will smile almost apologetically as she says it, thus providing a conflicting signal. On one hand she is making a statement, on the other hand she is smiling as she does not really mean it. The message is confused and can be misinterpreted leading to a possible escalation of the situation. The same sort of confusion could happen when someone offers you a lift home or asks you if they can buy you another drink when you know you have had enough.

Charecteristics

• Walk in a hurried fashion and appear flustered
• Stand or sit with folded arms and hunched shoulders
• Avoid eye contact
• Speak in a quiet hesitant manner
• Tend not speak up for themselves
• They want to gain the approval of others and avoid confrontations

Aggressive Behaviour And Self Defence

Aggressive behaviour tends to be exhibited by those who have little or no regard for other peoples rights and opinions. Aggressive behavior can involve the use of sarcasm, the adoption of a patronizing attitude and placing the blame for mistakes on the other person. If a situation arose where a potential confrontation such as a traffic dispute arose, this type of person would put the blame on the other person in a loud aggressive manner, and may even resort to verbal insults and finger pointing. This could lead to an escalation of the situation which is what you do not want.

Charecteristics

• Loud aggressive voice
• Staring at people they are trying to dominate
• Finger pointing
• Invading other people’s space
• React aggressively to confrontations and make them worse

Assertive Behaviour And Self Defence

Assertiveness is a specific type of behaviour which assists us in communicating clearly our needs, wants and opinions without abusing other peoples rights in any way. The message is not lost through hesitant actions or body signals and is clear and to the point. A technique used in assertiveness training is called BROKEN RECORD and is very good at de-escalating situations. Image that you are parking your car and someone claims they were going to park before you and approaches you in a very aggressive manner. If you were assertive you would look at them in a firm manner and say something like ‘I can see you are upset but I had no idea that you were waiting to park’. If the person continued you would repeat the same ‘I can see you are upset but I had no idea you were waiting to park’. After repeating this line three or four times the other person should realise they are getting nowhere and basically gets bored. Because you have neither backed down or escalated the situation your self esteem has remained intact as you have controlled the situation. The same technique could be used if a persistent man was trying to offer you a lift home or someone was trying to buy you a drink.

Charecteristics

• Plan and communicate effectively
• Tends to stand tall and look at people in a calm confident manner
• Stands up for their rights without abusing others
• Tends to use the word ‘I’ to make a point i.e. I think there has been a misunderstanding, I thought it was my parking space
• Uses eye contact and body language to back up verbal communication
• Talks in a calm clear voice

How To Become Assertive

A good reason for someone not asserting themselves is that they feel that they are not worth it. The person is lacking in self esteem and confidence. Gael Lindenfield in her book wrote that most therapists she knows are in agreement that low self esteem is at the heart of almost every mental health problem. Having a bad opinion of yourself makes you more vulnerable to any kind of stress or setback. To increase self esteem become more aware of your personal appearance and treat yourself on a regular basis because as the advert says ‘Your worth it’. Join a class or course on Assertiveness and this will increase your confidence and self esteem and help in a self defence situation as well as everyday life.

I hope that you have enjoyed reading this article and have found it both informative and thought-provoking. Self defence is a skill well worth acquiring but remember reading an article is not enough without practicing and applying the skills. To make karate more relevant to everyday life and situations I feel self defence should be part of karate training. Try using karate techniques in self defence situations and have students come up with their own techniques just like kata applications. I would suggest that the best technique is the one with the simplest movements as research has shown that complicated techniques will not work under extreme pressure with a non compliant aggressor.

But remember the best means of self defence is to avoid dangerous situations. If you find yourself in a dangerous situation do not underestimate it and be assertive. If after doing all this you have to defend yourself do everything you can to come out on top within the boundaries of the law. Please email me using the link below with any comments or articles on self defence that you want to share with the readers.

Philip Eastwood (Author)

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